Inspired by several sources (Jezebel's newly emerging series, Manda's Friday tradition, some comments on the state of my mortal soul and my inherent love of lists and talking about myself) I've decided that there are some more things you must know about me, Internet, if we are to continue on. And so in a crazy amalgamation of my inspirations I present:
Fifty things you probably will never need to know about me, handily split into manageable bitesized chunks, but nevertheless will ensure that you will know me better than 90% of my general acquaintance by the end of the post....about the way I look 1. The pendulum of my self image swings wildly between "I'm hideous" and "Holy shit I'm actually rather pretty" with literally no mid-arc point of "meh". There is no reason for this. And contrarily I actually feel better about myself when I compare me to others.
2. I am ludicrously vain, I watch myself walk past in mirrors, shop windows, metallic surfaces of any kind. If it's reflective I
will check myself out in it. This is reflexive.
3. My childhood anorexia was in no way linked to body image.
4. I have an ongoing love affair with my own hair. Occasionally I find this weird, but seriously people. It's gorgeous, silky, well behaved and longer than it's ever been before. I love it.
5. I hate my arms with the kind of passion that people usually reserve for baby killers and people who club seals. I
never have bare arms in public. I don't care that they "aren't that bad" I feel like crap with them on show so I'm not going to take off my cardigan no matter how bloody hot it is.
...about my home 1. I've never been able to do the whole "student living in one room" thing. My crap is spread all over the house, along with everyone else's. Although mine takes up roughly five times the space of theirs put together.
2. My flatmates B and G are a couple. And they're lovely.
3. Between us we have 5 TVs, 3 DVD players, 2 PS2s, 3 Laptops, 1 PC, 1 Gamecube and 5 Stereo systems. We have no idea how.
4. Whoever cooks is exempt from washing up. G and I only ever remember to wash up because B is a neat freak and we're scared of her.
5. I keep my pretentious books on the two sets of shelves in the living room and in the hall, my trashy novels are kept under my bed. Yes, I am ashamed of half the things I read.
...about me and the arts 1. If I had to choose only one of my senses to keep it would be sight because I would die without the ability to read. Plus I could still enjoy anime.
2. In my opinion there is nothing better in this world than going to a midnight screening of a movie you're desperate to see and then discovering that you're the only one there. Nothing.
3. Music just doesn't "do it for me" the way it seems to for other people, I'm chameleon like in my tastes and very few songs move me to feel much of anything. I've never been obsessive about a band and unless I can hang out at the back by the bar I hate concerts.
4. I think that if a movie was filmed in a particular language then that is the language it should be watched in. Dubbing is the work of the devil.
5. Art galleries are sanctuaries for me but more often than not I end up sitting in a corner completely engrossed in what I'm writing. I think I just like the quiet.
...about me and men 1. Although there have been more than one when I refer to the Ex Mr. TheOdd it is always the same person. I don't like him very much, although I used to. I have been single now for the longer than I ever have been before. I have also been happier than I have ever been before. I'm pretty sure these are related.
2. I've never slept with someone for the first time when sober. This really upset me until polling my friends and realising that a) I make it sound a loads worse than it is b) I don't actually suffer from beer goggles to any great extent and c) at least I can remember all of them.
3. I don't have many male friends. I went to an all girl's school so I find interaction with guys kind of awkward, plus I'm incredibly suspicious (and arrogant) and instantly assume any man who is nice to me has an ulterior motive.
4. I find it actually cripplingly embarrassing to admit to liking someone. I simply cannot do it. I have not one single clue why but I feel like if I do all my dignity will be stripped. Which is insane as after the Ex Mr. TheOdd I'm not entirely convinced I have any.
5. I've been in love twice, one of them I dated, one of them not. One I still have feelings for, one definitely not. Neither loved me back. This doesn't upset me, in fact it makes me kind of glad.
...about my Family1. I am the only person to have ever been University educated on either side of my family.
2. I'm also the first grandchild on both sides - although not the eldest.
3. My Mother and I speak to each other pretty much every day owing to the fact that we both have really boring jobs.
4. I refer to my step-father as Grumpy and fully intend to encourage any children either I or my step-brother have to do the same.
5. I adopt aunts on a semi-regular basis. So far I have about six. I adopt sisters too although that's much rarer and there have only been two women who have inspired me to do so.
...about my life Online1. There is only one mention of me on Google under any permutation of my real names, this wasn't intentional but I'm very happy with it.
2. I am an Internet attention whore and get fairly obsessive about it. I know, there's a shocking fact you never knew. Although: I read a hell of a lot more blogs than I comment on.
3. Google reader may have in fact prevented me from being fired.
4. I used to use the alias "Eternally Ignored" but ditched it when I moved out of my self-pitying phase
5. I, personally, believe that due to the existence of spell checkers illiteracy is even
less forgivable online.
...about me and food 1. I eat out of boredom and fast out of distress.
2. My sweet tooth is legendary.
3. Desserts should be warm and ideally served with vanilla icecream. (Examples include my home made toffee apple crumble, chocolate brownies and golden syrup sponge. Exceptions to the rule: Cheesecake and chocolate mousse.)
4. I'm not a fan of sandwiches. I like them but I can think of better foodstuffs.
5. Once I decide I like something I'll happily eat it every single day for at least a couple of weeks, often this involves having the exact same meal every day for lunch and occasionally again for supper, I see nothing wrong with this.
...about me and emotions 1. I'm contrary. Pointing this out to me just makes me worse. I know this. Doesn't mean I can change it.
2. I overshare. Badly.
3. I get very, very paranoid. I can quite happily convince myself that any conversation that's going on slightly out of ear shot is about me.
4. My god, I look terrible when I cry. In the real world I don't cry when I'm upset, only when I'm angry. Books and TV make my cry all the time though.
5. I feel in colours.
...about my friends 1. I suffer from "only child syndrome" according to my high school friends, making me selfish, whiny, determined to be the centre of attention and unable to share. Luckily they pretty much kicked this out of me via a systematic campaign of what can only be called "bullying" over the years. And I love them for it.
2. I'm terrible at keeping in touch with people so unless I see someone every day I tend to lose touch with them very quickly. Facebook has made my life a much more sociable place.
3. I'm keenly aware that my friends have flaws and I'm not prone to hero worship. Most descriptions of my friends begin with "I love X but...." they know this and do the same about me.
4. We don't have drama with each other. Although I thrive on the drama that other people have in their lives when it comes to my own friends and the relationships between me and them there is no fighting, no back stabbing and no scheming. I find it too exhausting and anyone that that kind of thing happens around doesn't class as a "friend" for very long.
5. I have several different circles of friends which never cross over, some people find this odd but the number of nicknames I have alone makes this arrangement much easier on everyone.
...about the things that make me... me.1. I love lists. Like,
love them. Everything makes more sense in list form. Especially if there are ticky boxes involved.
2. As we've already mentioned I don't find puppies particularly cute. I can't help it. I think I still have a soul though.
3. Nobody finds it weird any more when my answer to the question "What are you up to this evening?" consists of "Oh not much, I have to kill Rasputin and then hunt down some photos of naked men for this tailor... I need a new dress for my animated mannequin you see".
4. I have really specific compulsions. Mess and dirt I can handle (OK, OK I barely notice) but if something is out of order it sets my teeth on edge until I can fix it.
5. I won't feel validated unless you comment.
